Struggle With Jealousy?

Jealousy is an ugly word surrounded with bad energy. But Jealousy is also a very complex emotion that deserves some unpacking. The interesting part about feeling jealousy is that it forces us to look within and reflect. We feel jealousy for two fundamental reasons. One, we are witnessing a quality within someone else that we are capable of but just haven’t yet achieved it ourselves. And two, jealousy is an emotion based in fear. You can feel jealous of another’s success yet, you are fearful to take the same leap they took to get to that point. You can feel jealous of another’s relationship but you have yet to lay down the foundations for a strong loving relationship because of the fear of rejection or dissatisfaction or disappointment, etc.


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Why do we even feel jealousy in the first place? Low self-esteem? Feelings of jealousy can be rooted in the fact that you haven’t done the work to increase your self-esteem to a healthy level. Need I remind you that strong self-esteem is rooted in: seeking and developing positive relationships, eating the right foods, following your higher purpose, exercising, getting enough sleep, practicing good posture, following your dreams, managing your money, moving beyond your past experiences, and being a part of something bigger than yourself! I know it takes a lot to build confidence, so make sure you are always building up and not knocking down.

We must shift jealousy into positive energy. We must shift jealousy into praise and encouragement for that person, all while squashing our fears and taking action towards what we truly desire. See jealousy as a friendly reminder that it’s time to do some emotional health maintenance.

Other words that are similar to jealousy are envy, desire, and resentment. One can understand envy and desire, but resentment? The resentment felt is probably not for that person but for the fact that you are not being the best person you could be or you are not living your true purpose. That resentment is towards ourselves yet we are projecting it onto someone else. Feelings of jealousy should be shifted into feelings of encouragement for you to start living the life you desire.

If you find yourself feeling jealous, ask yourself…

1. What do I see in them that I could work on within me?
2. What actions can I take in my life to live my higher purpose?
3. What is it that I truly need at this moment to feel better? (Do I need more rest, nutrition, water, exercise?)
4. Why does this person bring out these emotions in me? What is my lesson here?
5. What can I do to improve my self-esteem right now?
6. What can I do to build self-esteem in the long-term?
7. What is jealousy telling me I need to work on?

Let the feelings of jealousy be a motivation to go deeper within and reflect as to why you actually feel jealous. All jealousy represents is something within you that is not being expressed, accomplished, or discovered for your highest good. Also, practicing mindfulness and keeping a gratitude journal can be great practices to combat the negative feeling of jealousy. Do you have a mindfulness practice? Could you pick up a notebook to journal in?

Go deep, take action, encourage others, and know jealousy is rooted in dark energy to slow you down and block you from your greatness. Unblock yourself! – Anna Marie